Pickles are to be eaten, not to be in

I have found myself in a very pickled situation, and no, it's not because "marcus" hasn't accepted one of my cookies all week, or that my buddy Cassie chased him around the PAC/Drama room demanding a hug, forcing him to hide behind the stage and when he came out he had a broom to defend himself. And it's not because I lied to my mother and went to starbucks instead of studying during the free period on Monday.

There's this boy, and we'll call him , er, I don't know, Pocket! So, Pocket is in my second period class, and during the free period, after returning to campus, My friend and i saw him hanging out with our buddy MoJo, and out of lack of seat on the bench I hopped onto his lap and started playing with his iPod. Of course then a campus supervisor came over and I had to hop off, but by that time Mojo and my friend had gone to the bathroom. The couple sitting on the bench across from us were holding hands, they were friends and acquaintances of ours, and the girl pointed to their hands and then to Pocket's. He held out his hand to me, and I took it, not giving it much thought. Then Mojo and friend 1 came back and friend 1 gaped at me.

"It's not what you think!" I exclaimed. She pulled me over to the side and informed me that Mojo and Pocket were going on a date on Sunday.

Mojo was uncertain, though, and told my to come along because she wasn't sure if she liked him at all. At first I said yes, then I said no, and at the football game on Friday while walking across the bleachers Pocket would always reach out his hand and I would take it until i was out of reach. That night he friended me on Facebook and we exchanged numbers.

Then, on Saturday, after a horrible dragonboat practice, I attended a party with my parents and was invited again on the date by Pocket himself.

He is such a guy, trying to be charming in texts. I remember on the drive up to the party he asked me, "You know what I love?"

"What?" was the inevitable response.

"Your hair," He replied. And that night there was a similar conversation: "You know what I love besides your hair?"

"What?" the usual response.

"Your lips, and your smile," He texted back.

I then made a bunch of funny faces in the mirror involving my lips. Experimenting with different smiles. lips closed or open? should I open wide with my teeth as if I'm laughing? or keep them closed? Experimenting with different lipsticks that stained my teeth.

So as Sunday came about, I tagged along on the date, bringing Zoe so I wouldn't be alone. Pocket was a half an hour late.

We saw a fabulous chick flick at the mall and had ice cream and pretzels. Now, Mojo was saying how she didn't like him at all. It was then that I started wondering if I had feelings for him? If so, what would happen with "marcus" and Jane" ? I quickly remembered a scene from my dream that i had that last night. How I was at someone's house and "marcus" was beckoning me into a pool. We jumped in with our clothes on and started dancing and I kissed a lot of boys in space.

I couldn't think much more on my dream because Pocket was feeding me a yellow skittle that tasted like bad bananas.

Lord of the Rings was the movie being played when Zoe and I got back home. Mojo had told Pocket she didn't like him and that I did and he was texting me about how much money he spent that day.

"Yeah," He was saying. "I was hoping to ask this girl, Izzy, if she wanted to go out Saturday night,"

"Oh no, she would have loved to go," I sent back to him. And so it was settled, and now I've got this butterfly, sick feeling in my stomach that I usually get before I'm about to do something stupid or unfamiliar. I've never been out on a real date before, and I don't dare ponder the thought. If I over think it, I'll flake like a bad case of dandruff. Maybe that's what I should do? It probably isn't very fair that I go out with him the weekend after Mojo did. Was she being truthful when she said she didn't like him? Was I being truthful when I implied that I did? I was having fun in the moment, I'm not sure how I feel about anything. Heck, I don't even know how I feel about my extracurricular activities!

and what if "Jane" ends up liking me, and I'm already starting to go out with Pocket? What then?

And what if "marcus" realizes that I am the most amazing human being on the face of the planet and starts interacting with me with more than a "stfu" look that he usually gives me.

Well, of course, that might never happen, but a girl can dream can't she?

What if I fall out of love with my fantasy future?

What if I become serious with Pocket and it lasts more than two weeks?

What if he tries to kiss me on our first date?

What if a zombie disease broke out and Pocket and I were the only ones left alive on the planet and we had to restart the whole human race, combining our DNA with dragonflies to create human hybrids that take over the world and murder us both, enslaving the little offspring we have come to produce through the years?!?

I DON'T WANT TO GO ON A DATE!! I've only just started Big school! I'm too young to be tied down!!

Piano lessons start back up thursday, until next time my little chicken tenders :-*