My week is completely booked, BTW, I had rehearsal this evening and also have it tomorrow and Thursday. I have a piano lesson on Wednesday and the Father Daughter dance on Friday. This is where we come to the problem which I will have to explain with an awfully long story that started last Tuesday. My evening was flooded with homework and I was so exhausted that my Anne Frank reading and response work almost put me too sleep. Please note that when a small child such as I is tired our emotions heighten to such extent that we won't listen to anybody or anything except a hug and some ice cream, no words necessary unless they are "No, you don't have to do all this work, here, have a pony." Sadly, none of these were at hand and I spent the rest of the night crying and working and reading and crying and clinging to mummy and sleeping. Obviously there was no room to study for the test I had the following day and this angered the great godly parents of Izzania. I didn't want to get a bad grade and disappoint them so I decided to look over the requirement sheet for the test. I gaped at the purple piece of paper, I couldn't answer a single practice question on it and soon realized I was doomed to fail. The previous night's sorrow filled my eyes again and I begged mummy and daddy to let me stay home and study so I wouldn't fail the test.
Honestly, now that I look back, it would have been easier to just go to school and take my chances in Mr. Mac's classroom. When missing school on Wednesday I not only missed the easy test and the due date for a grading packet that was worth a little over a hundred points (I will turn that in mumsie, don't fret) but also the Gay Straight Alliance meeting that was usually held on thursdays but apparently not today. I would've missed the mile run too if it hadn't been on thursday, and then I would've been in big trouble.
When I told my parents it was like I shot my mom in the foot. The despair washed over me and I could tell that I disappointed her, that she was starting to believe that I would end up like my brother, irresponsible and untruthful. It was as if I betrayed her, and maybe I did, it was selfish to take Wednesday all for myself yet I did it anyway out of fear (which so happens to be a reason for a great deal of things these days).
I couldn't help but cry, I was so sorry for what I had done. Mother told me not to cry though, she said to take scolding like a strong woman. I didn't feel strong though, I felt small and fragile. I didn't want to upset her anymore so I silently dashed upstairs and sobbed out all my regret. That night was Pioneer night, where all the eighth graders from little school get to see the electives and things at the big school. As we silently drove to the big school I remembered the previous drive to piano lesson that day. How momma had me promise her that I would never ever lie to her, she was close to tears then, as if my promise spared her the worry of another defiant teenager. Goodness, and what I said to her during dinner must have been like a slap to the face, or a shot to the foot as I put it. Karma struck then for as I was exiting the car, fixing my frilly skirt, and checking my earrings, the door slammed on my thumb resulting in another reason to cry. My thumb is now swollen and there is a dark stain under my nail from the dried blood. I couldn't tie my shoes for days, I couldn't even play Jojo on friday or do my Anne Frank journal entries.
While in the big school gym mom asked when I was going to get the Mr. Oboe Man contact information from Mr. K for I hadn't done that yet. "Tomorrow?" She asked. "Next week? Next month?" She was still agitated and her joking came off as cruel.
Friday afternoon on the ride home I told her that I would take the missing test after school next week and that Mr. K had forgotten to give my the contact info. As it turns out, he was expecting me to follow him to the orchestra room where I would get it there but since the orchestra room was like an alien planet to me and Mr. K never turned to see if I followed I was discouraged. Mother thanked me with a sigh of relief, she told me that I did the right thing trying to catch up with my appointments.
Sunday came with a whole new sea of discomfort. We spent the evening eating Zoe's home made coconut cream pie and playing mahjong with the Fungs, dear friends of ours. Rachel Fung is a year younger then I, we go to the same school and she influenced me to do dragon boat. we were all rather hyper and enjoying ourselves when zoe answered one of Rachel's question with her usual response: "Up your butt and around the corner!" Mom pointed out that that was inappropriate, Zoe muttered a pathetic excuse and we continued. Let me point out to you that Rachel and I were on the same team since I hadn't the slightest idea how to play mahjong and she scolded me from time to time when I picked up or moved the wrong piece, I would then respond with an apology or a pathetic excuse of my own. Mom decided to mimic me, she adopted this from Ben since he would do it to make others laugh and make me feel like throwing up at how high and screechy he thought my voice was, she made a very incomprehensible, inhuman sound that i guess was supposed to be me and I stared at her in dismay. Now look who's being inappropriate, I thought. I clearly stated my opinion of this by saying "Up your butt and around the corner." Which, as I found out, wasn't a proper thing to say to an adult. Mother told me she was a grownup and could say such things as she liked and scolded me for being so rude, I was flabbergasted and chose to be nonexistent for the rest of the evening.
Even though we have seemed to have gone far from topic, which was my busy schedule and the problem, let me help out. Busy after school schedule = no after school test taking = no test taking. Period. Mr. mac won't allow me to take it during class because he cares so mush about me that he doesn't want me to miss a single fact or lecture, and suggested I take the test home and work on it there. Hmm, I wonder if he pondered the possibility of cheating, oh well.
Now I must be off and find something shiny to look at. Until next time, my Girlies :-*
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